[ ALL CHEERING ] >> [ SCREECHES ]
>> ♪ ADVENTURE TIME ♪ ♪ COME ON, GRAB YOUR FRIENDS ♪
♪ WE'LL GO TO VERY DISTANT LANDS ♪
♪ WITH JAKE THE DOG AND FINN THE HUMAN ♪
♪ THE FUN WILL NEVER END ♪ ♪ IT'S ADVENTURE TIME ♪
>> Jake: NICE.
LITTLE BIRD FAMILY ON VACAY.
DADDY'S GOT THE MAD-BEAUTIFUL TAIL FEATHERS.
MOMMY'S TAKING UP THE REAR ALL PLAIN-JANE STYLES.
>> [ FARTS ] >> Jake: [ CHUCKLES ]
GLAD I GET TO DATE A BEAUTIFUL RAINICORN -- NOT SOME NASTY
BIRD.
>> HEY! DON'T BE TALKING TRASH!
OUR LADIES ARE BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE, YOU CREEP!
>> Jake: ALL LADY BIRDS AROUND THE WHOLE WORLD ARE BEAUTIFUL ON
THE INSIDE?
>> YES.
>> Jake: FAIR ENOUGH.
>> SPECIAL DELIVERY FOR JAKE THE DOG.
>> Jake: COOL. THANKS.
HMM.
"URGENT."
HOLD STILL, BMO!
>> OUCH!
I HURT MY BUTT SLEDDING.
>> Jake: OH, DANG. SORRY, BMO.
COOL, MAN! I'M EXCITED!
[ STATIC ] [ MUNCHING ]
>> [ MUFFLED SCREAMING ] >> Jake: WHAT THE HECK AM I
LOOKING AT?
[ SPITS ] JAKE JR.?!
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!
>> JAKE THE DOG, WE HAVE YOUR DAUGHTER.
SHE IS SAFE -- FOR NOW.
>> Jake: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
>> WE NEED YOU TO REASSEMBLE YOUR OLD TEAM --
GARETH, A.K.A.
THE LADY MASTER...
THE FLYING LETTUCE BROTHERS, NOTORIOUS CON-MEN
IMPRESSIONISTS...
AND YOUR OLD FRIEND TIFFANY.
>> Jake: GLOBBIT.
>> YOU WILL NEED THEM TO BREAK INTO THE ROYAL CANDY VAULT AND
STEAL THIS.
>> Jake: THE BAKER'S SHARD -- THE PUREST SOURCE OF SUGAR IN
THE KNOWN REGIONS.
>> YOU ARE THE ONLY MASTER THIEF WITH THE SKILLS TO SWIPE IT.
YOU HAVE UNTIL MIDNIGHT TO MAKE THE DROP.
TELL ANYONE, AND JAKE JR. GETS IT.
>> Jake: BMO...
DESTROY THE TAPE.
>> [ GRUNTS ] >> Jake: ARE WE ON THE LEVEL,
BMO?
>> I AIN'T NO CLOWN-TOWN SNITCH, BABY.
>> Jake: I DON'T WANT FINN HEARING ABOUT THIS.
>> ALL RIGHT.
[ BEEPING ] >> [ LAUGHS ]
OH, BRUNARD, ARE YOU SURE?
>> YEAH, BABE.
I'M TOTALLY FAMOUS, AND YOU LOVE ME.
>> W-WHAT'S HAPPENING?
WHAT AM I FEELING NOW?
>> YOU ARE UNDER THE SPELL OF MY FACE.
I GOT YOU, GIRL, IN MY FACE TRAP, AND YOU LOVE IT.
>> [ Monotone ] I...DO.
BRUNARD, DON'T EVER LEAVE ME.
I'LL GIVE YOU EVERYTHING -- MY FABRICS, MY DRESS PATTERNS, MY
MARBLES, MY SOCIAL STANDING.
[ BEEPING ] >> WHOOPS! I GOTTA GO.
LATERS!
>> DINE AND DASH? I SAW THAT!
>> HEY, BOSS, I WANTED TO -- >> SHUT UP, TONYA.
I GOTTA SEE MY EX-WIFE!
>> OHH.
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ] HELLO. SQUEEZY MART.
>> [ As boss ] TONYA, THIS IS YOUR BOSS!
>> WAIT. YOU WERE JUST HERE.
>> YEAH!
NOW I'M ON THE PHONE, STUPID!
>> HEY, DO YOU THINK I COULD LEAVE EARLY?
I'M, LIKE, DEPRESSED.
>> WHAT YOU COULD DO IS TAKE ALL THE MONEY OUT OF THE REGISTER
AND GIVE IT TO THE TWO GUYS OUT BACK BY THE DUMPSTER!
>> [ SIGHS ] OKAY.
THEN CAN I GO?
>> YES.
>> HERE YOU GO, DUDES.
>> [ Normal voice ] THANKS, MAN.
>> PEACE.
>> GOODBYE, FAIR LAD.
[ BEEPING ] THE MASTER RETURNS!
[ SQUEAKING ] >> [ BREATHES DEEPLY ]
[ BEEPING ] WELL, WELL.
FROM THE SHADOWS OF DREAM, THE DOG WAKES TO FIND ITS...
UH...
THE DOG WAKES TO FIND ITS MANGY TAIL FLOPPING IN THE DUST LIKE A
FISH IN A TREE.
THAT FISH IS ME -- TIFFANY!
[ LAUGHS ] I'M COMING, JAKE!
I'M COMING!
[ DOOR CREAKS ] >> Jake: HI, GUYS.
WERE YOU WAITING FOR ME IN THE DARK?
>> TIFFANY WOULDN'T LET US TURN THEM ON.
>> NEVER MIND THAT!
THE REAL QUESTION IS...
WHAT'S THAT SLO-MO FINN KNOW ABOUT THIS?
[ CYMBALS RATTLING ] >> Finn: HEY, BMO, WHERE'S JAKE?
>> JAKE GOT BACK WITH HIS OLD GANG AND IS GOING TO ROB THE
CANDY KINGDOM.
>> Finn: [ LAUGHS ] OKAY, BMO.
>> [ CHUCKLES ] >> Finn: YOU WANT TO JOIN MY
PRIMITIVE NOISE BAND?
[ TRUMPETS ] [ BELLS JINGLE ]
HUHHHH?
>> NO. I LIKE ORGANIZED SOUND.
>> Finn: PSHH!
[ OFF-KEY MUSIC PLAYS ] LA-LA-LA!
WHOO!
>> Jake: NAH, BMO's COVERING FOR ME.
>> SO, WHAT'S THE DEAL, JAKE?
>> YEAH, WHY'D YOU CALL US BACK?
>> Jake: I GOT A JOB FOR YOU GUYS.
ONE LAST SCORE -- THE BIG ONE.
>> THE BAKER'S SHARD?
[ CHUCKLES ] ARE YOU FOR REAL, MAN?
>> HEY, THAT'S CRAZY, JAKE.
WE ALWAYS SAID, "PLAY IT SAFE."
>> CAN'T YOU SEE, GUYS?
HE'S DESPERATE.
SOMEBODY GOT TO HIM 'CAUSE HE'S SOFT NOW.
>> Jake: WHAT THE -- PSHH!
TIFFANY!
I'M THE SAME JAKE!
I JUST STOPPED STEALING, MOSTLY.
BECAUSE WHEN YOU GET OLDER, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GET INTO
OTHER STUFF, LIKE GRAPHIC DESIGN OR POTTERY.
IT'S CALLED "GROWING UP"!
>> I DON'T WANT TO DO POETRY -- I MEAN, POTTERY.
>> Jake: DUDE!
ARE YOU GUYS ON BOARD OR WHAT?!
YOU REALLY GOT SOMETHING BETTER TO DO?!
REALLY?!
I KNOW YOU DON'T, TIFFANY!
>> GLOM YOU, JAKE.
>> HOW ARE WE GONNA SPLIT THE BAKER'S SHARD?
>> Jake: WE AIN'T KEEPING IT.
I'M PASSING THE SHARD OFF TO A MYSTERY DUDE.
>> WHAT THE...?!
>> Jake: THE DUDE HAS MY KID.
MY LITTLE JAKE JR. [ CLEARS THROAT ]
>> I'M IN.
>> WE'RE IN.
>> I KNOW THAT VAULT INSIDE AND OUT -- EVERY GUARD ROTATION,
EVERY CAMERA, EVERY DEADLY TRAP.
AND THAT SAFE IS LOCKED UP SO TIGHT, IT MAKES ME WANNA SPIT
OUT MY GUTS AND CRY ABOUT IT.
DO YOU EVEN HAVE A PLAN, JAKE?!
>> Jake: I HAVE THE FIRST PART.
OKAY, LET'S FREAKIN' DO THIS!
[ KEYBOARD CLICKS ] >> CAPTAIN, THE MILK DELIVERY
HAS ARRIVED.
>> WELL, CHECK THEM IN, PRIVATE.
>> YES, SIR.
>> AND, PRIVATE, I'M VERY THIRSTY.
BRING ME BACK THE MOST DELICIOUS FLAVOR THEY HAVE.
>> YES, SIR!
>> [ SCRIBBLING ] [ STATIC ]
HUH?
NOW, WHAT IN THE HECK?
>> [ As Private ] I'M BACK WITH YOUR MILK, SIR.
>> WHAT FLAVOR DID YOU BRING ME, PRIVATE?
>> BANANA, SIR!
>> WHAT?!
>> BANANA MILK!
>> BLAGH! NO!
THE FORBIDDEN FLAVOR!
IT'S...
DELICIOUS.
>> [ Voices adjusting ] IT'S...
IT'S...
[ As Captain ] IT'S DELICIOUS!
[ FEEDBACK ] ATTENTION, ALL GUARDS!
YOU ARE DIRECTED TO REPORT IMMEDIATELY TO THE COURTYARD
FOR SPECIAL TRAINING!
>> Jake: OKAY, DO YOUR THING, MAN.
>> JUST LIKE OLD TIMES, RIGHT, JAKE?
WHEN WE WERE BLOOD, WE'D FOLLOW EACH OTHER INTO THE JAWS OF
DEATH ON A PALE HORSE.
>> Jake: NOT NOW, TIFFANY.
COME ON!
[ GRUNTS ] >> UGH!
>> TODAY, WE'LL BE WORKING ON OUR BATTLE "KEE-YAHs."
OKAY, MEN! SOUND OFF!
[ ALL YELLING ] [ YELLING CONTINUES ]
ALL RIGHT, SOLDIERS, TIME TO SHRED THOSE PIPES!
I WANT TO HEAR YOU SCREAM!
[ ALL SCREAMING ] [ ALL SCREAMING ]
LOUDER! PUSH IT HARD!
[ SCREAMING INTENSIFIES ] [ CLOCK TICKING ]
[ ALARM RINGS ] [ SCREAMING STOPS ]
[ BOTH COUGH ] [ LOCK CLICKS ]
[ DOORS CREAK ] >> THE BAKER'S SHARD IS ON THE
OTHER SIDE OF THAT -- THE CORRIDOR OF A THOUSAND DEATHS.
>> Jake: WHOA!
WHOA!
YOW!
>> [ GROWLING ] >> Jake: WOW!
WHOA!
[ BREATHING HEAVILY ] [ SNAKES HISS ]
WHEW!
I DID IT!
FOR JAKE JR.!
>> STOP RIGHT THERE.
>> Jake: YOU!
WHERE'S MY DAUGHTER?!
>> THROW ME THE BAKERS SHARD, AND I'LL LET HER GO.
>> Jake: YEAH, RIGHT!
THAT'S SUPER-DUMB!
>> DADDY!
PLEASE DO WHAT HE SAYS!
>> Jake: HANG ON, SWEETIE!
UNGH!
>> [ As Jake Jr. ] THANK YOU FOR SAVING ME...
[ Normal voice ] DADDY!
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jake: [ GASPS ]
YOU DIRTY -- >> [ LAUGHS ]
NOW...
UH...
I'M THE DOG, AND YOU'RE THE TAIL!
NOW YOU CHASE ME!
YOU CHASE MY DREAMS!
[ ALARM RINGING ] >> ALERT. SECURITY BREACH.
ALERT.
>> Jake: [ GROWLS ] [ TIRES SCREECH ]
[ TIRES SQUEAL ] JAKE JR.!
[ GROWLING ] [ TIRES SCREECH ]
>> OH, CRUD!
JAKE! I LOVE YOU!
I LOVE YO-O-O-O-U!
>> Jake: SHUT IT, TIFFANY!
GIVE ME MY DAUGHTER!
>> TA-DA!
I TOTALLY DOUBLE-CROSSED YOU!
>> Jake: JAKE JR.?!
WHAT THE PUKE, GIRL?!
>> LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
[ TIRES SQUEAL ] >> Jake: WHAT THE FUNKY FRESH,
HONEY?
>> I JUST WANTED TO BE LIKE YOU.
MOM TOLD ME STORIES ABOUT WHEN YOU DID CRIMES.
>> Jake: THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO -- BEFORE I KNEW IT WAS
WRONG!
>> I THOUGHT YOU'D BE PROUD OF ME.
>> Jake: [ SIGHS DEEPLY ] I AM.
I COULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE.
>> I AGE FAST, REMEMBER?
I'M 22!
>> Jake: RIGHT.
I KEEP FORGETTING MATHS.
>> WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT THE OLD CREW?
>> Jake: FINN AND I WILL BUST THEIR APPLES TOMORROW.
OR MAYBE THE BANANA GUARDS WILL GET 'EM.
>> Together: WEE-OOH! WEE-OOH!
WEE-OOH! WEE-OOH!
>> Jake: COME ON.
I'LL TAKE YOU HOME NOW.
>> I LOVE YOU, POPS.
>> Jake: I LOVE YOU, TOO.
DON'T STINKIN' DO THIS TO ME AGAIN.
I'M OLD AND FAT.
I'LL PROBABLY HAVE A HEART ATTACK.
>> OKAY.
>> Jake: WAIT A MINUTE!
YOU'RE DOING A LONG CON RIGHT NOW, AREN'T YOU?
>> NO.
YES.
>> Jake: NOW I'M REALLY PROUD OF YOU!
>> ♪ COME ALONG WITH ME ♪ ♪ AND THE BUTTERFLIES AND BEES ♪
♪ WE CAN WANDER THROUGH THE FOREST ♪
♪ AND DO SO AS WE PLEASE ♪ ♪ COME ALONG WITH ME ♪
♪ TO A CLIFF UNDER A TREE ♪